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Supreme Court rules that naturally occurring DNA cannot be patented

Supreme Court rules that naturally occurring DNA cannot be patented – http://pulse.me/s/qil1VI2DS

There’s hope yet, these creepy companies were trying to patent our DNA so they could literally own the rights to our genetic composition were shut down. We wouldn’t have had a choice in the matter unless we could become geneticists over night, and buy the umpteenkabillion worth of machinery required to decode and isolate our own genes.
Once again money mass would have steam rolled what was right and decent.

Normally I am not to pleased with the decisions coming out of there, but today I have to give it to them.

Bravo supreme court! Way to show your humanity. Keep it up and we may pull out of this dive yet.

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The first woman on earth to give birth to an alien baby

image

Me lovely Mum visiting from Ireland. Isn’t she angelic. She works tirelessly to improve herself and the world we live in. Currently she studies under and works with Derek O’NEILL, author of “more truth will set you free”. They feed 35,000 people per night, and have built much needed schools in other countries. Go mum!…and Derek!

Love, peace and happy cheese

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wiping your butt with a corn cob

Back in the old days, long before low flush toilets, cushioned toilet seats, and toilet paper so soft it makes you anus smile, your relatives in the “great great” category had to walk outside, go into a little wood shed, plunk their ass down on a wood bench with a hole in it, poop into a hole in the ground, and when they were finished, wipe their ass with a corn cob.

My understanding is that it would hang from a string attached to the outhouse wall and dangle into a bucket of water. This was for two reasons.
1. It kept the corncob soft. Wiping you dark side with a dried out corn cob would be like running a rasp across your tender stinky part.
2. It allowed the pooper to vigorously shake it around in the water to clean it before use. Otherwise you’d be rubbing everyone else’s waste into your butt crack. Gross with a capital GROSS!! Can you imagine sharing used toilet paper with your grandmother? Knowing what we know now, no matter how hard you shook that corncob in that bucket, there would still be micro nuggets of grandmas butt remanents on it. So no matter how you look at it, our earlier relatives regularly shared fecal matter. Your grandmother was probably born with pink eye.

What great historical knowledge, cornhole on the cob. Only a few generations have seen indoor plumbing. I wonder how many women used to sneak out to the outhouse and use the old corn cob to masturbate with? People must have thanked the lord when the sears catalogue came along. Something to read and toilet paper you didn’t have to share? Manna from heaven! I wonder if the corncob to catalog changeover was ever cause for generational friction.

Great grandma: come on mom just try it, its healthier and we don’t have to share.

Great great grandma: no daughter of mine is gonna use a newfangled contraption like that! Besides, the Sears catalog is the devil! And wiping with the same corn cob is what keeps a family together.

Anywho, this should serve to remind you of how lucky you are to have been born into a time when dropping a dirty bomb is practically a pleasure. Love your life and live well.

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Ron Paul: Edward Snowden May Be Target Of U.S. Drone Strike

http://www.news-republic.com/Web/ArticleWeb.aspx?regionid=1&articleid=9985906

What is that called again when you kill all of the witnesses that could expose you for the crimes you committed… Oh yeah, covering your tracks so you won’t get caught.

NSA = Nasty Son-of-a-bitches Association

Obama, in a recent speech, assured us that no American citizens were being listened to. So if that’s the case, and Snowden is droned, would that make Obama guilty and trying to cover his tracks?

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Lawmakers concerned over US surveillance programs

http://www.news-republic.com/Web/ArticleWeb.aspx?regionid=1&articleid=9991732

Can I just say…finally.
I have been railing against this nonsense for years, thank god the entire government is finally able to see what an average citizen has been able to see for years through simple media observation.
Of course, they probably were well aware of it all along, it was most likely just not beneficial for them to cry out in outrage until now. I just hope this isn’t a momentary feign of conscience to appease public outcry. I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt though. I choose to believe there is still some humanity left somewhere in these…humans?
At any rate, way to go Snowden!

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Twitter account hacked

All of this foreign writing to the right of this blog on my main page is my twitter feed. None of that writing is mine, I have been hacked. I haven’t been on there in awhile so I’m not sure when it happened, but I am working to get it resolved now.

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Tropical storm Andrea Holiday Florida

We are getting our first tropical storm here at the ROR Holiday Headquarters. A massive downpour by the name of tropical storm Andrea, complete with tornado and flood warnings. it has been raining here since yesterday morning, but as of yet nothing to tragic. I will dutifully report any interesting developments or comical goings on. Peace to your mother Finklemeyer.

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The Fear Blog

I know 1000 people who don’t know the truth. They swim through their self pity like a monster in a lake. They seize every opportunity to explode all over you like gooey ropes of wrath. The deep is unfathomable. The ceiling is visible. The end is near. Hiding is a way of life. They can’t know who you are. There’s too much noise. They’re waiting to pounce. They’re the lion, you’re the steak. The natural order of things is unlikely, but it is persistently in your face. You feel it every day like a pile driver pogo stick. You know the universe will never use a filing system. Chaos is the only real rule. You are not even safe in your own home. Home invasion.

Peacocks are real. Leaves have color. Dreams have flavor. We can mope or we can skip, one is just a better journey then the other. Do you want to walk, or do you want to stroll? Do you want to look down, or do you wanna look up. Life is not an isolation tank. We all get to exert force, we all get to feel everything. The truth is………
We’re all just a writhing mass of uneducated semem stuck in a reservoir tip full of spermacide at the bell end of a giant condom that has been wrapped around the dick of all dicks for a brief moment of pleasure in the sunshine.
A blip.

Enjoy it. Stick you fingers in it and give’em a wag. Get your nose up in there and take a good wiff. if it smells good give it a nice long lick. If it shits on you, bite it in the ass. There is pleasure in all things.
 

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Lifetime global odyssey

Yesterday I received my passport. Now I can continue my lifetime global odyssey. I have been compelled to see and experience as much of life and this world as I can ever since I was a young man. I have been a working traveler for a large portion of my life. I traveled many years working seasonally at national parks and remote resorts, I’ve lived in 13 states and mexico (at last count), and I was to leave the country several times during my life, but each time it was thwarted. There are the exceptions of Canada and Mexico, both of which I’ve been to several times, but in my mind they don’t really count. Both are connected by land. I was supposed to go to Australia where me and this lovely young girl had jobs lined up in a junkyard…but she backed out at the last minute. Then I was supposed to go to Fiji on a fishing boat…it burned down 3 days prior to departure. After that me and my good friend Ronald Steffuchi had jobs lined up at a resort in the canary islands that his sister was running…he got married to a girl I was dating and couldn’t go. Next I was invited on a trip to south America by a guy I worked at Paramount pictures with, we were going to hike 600 miles through the jungle….the day before the trip, my dad stole $7,500 from me and sold my motorcycle by forging the title. The other two guys went and were never heard from again…guess I was lucky. Ronald Steffuchi later called me back because he had gotten divorced and was rarin’ to go to the canary islands again…I was married. Finally, my ex girlfriend (the one I was supposed to go to Australia with) called me. She had gotten a substantial settlement for an accident she was in and wanted to bring me on a trip to hike all over Africa…I was still married. Me getting out of the country never really worked out, but I never gave up on my quest.
Although I am no longer really young, and I don’t travel as well as I used to, I am a stubborn bastard and can endure a lot of pain. I may see the world yet. I like to travel slow though, that’s why I always worked my way around. I work online now, which makes things easier. I don’t even have to find a job. I was thinking about going to Buenos Aires for a month or two. Apartments are cheap, and it seems like a party with great atmosphere. I think I will be going on a cruise first though. Last minute cruises are very inexpensive out of Tampa. I also think it would be amazing to due some volunteer work in remote places. The world is still my playground.
If anyone has any suggestions, please feel free to comment. I am a very adventurous soul.

Every year I try and take one hobo vacation just to have some interesting experiences and hone my skills. A hobo vacation (as I call it), is where I take off in my truck and sleep in the back of it while I attend free events, eat free food, borrow public and private services, see all kinds of beautiful places, work with my laptop, tablet and smart phone in libraries and coffee shops, and explore the cities I travel through and their histories. I also usually meet some pretty cool people.
Some of the free things I have done? Movies in the park, tons of free concerts and gigs, tons of free buffets (often with entertainment), food not bombs, many public beaches, club meetings, street fairs, educational events, firework events, holiday celebrations, bar events, fraternal dances…the list goes on. The world is full of fun and interesting things to do if you’re looking. I’ve gone swimming and jacuzzi-ingĀ  in many a hotel as well. My last big trip was up to Standpoint Idaho. I spent the summer on the lake boating, fishing and hanging out on the beach. At night they had cheap beer and events with prizes. I won a Willie Nelson CD, an mp3 player, several burger meals and a pizza. Was 1 second away from winning an all expenses payed trip to las Vegas. I went there on the way back to phoenix anyways. Stayed about a month and played the penny machines. Hung out for awhile with a lesbian couple that liked to quote Scooby Doo. The Scooby Doo lesbians were to cool.

I really need to start logging my journeys for this blog. Got all the tools now, think I will.

Gotta go, ttyl

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Bad Samaritans Netflix original hilarious

I’m watching the new Netflix original series “Bad Samaritans” and it is frickin funny. It has the Smeagle of no-longer-prime-time TV starring in it David Faustino.

Just playing David, I love seeing you in things, your net series “Star-ving” was hilarious as well. I am an aspiring director and if I ever become a sought after film maker, I would definitely want you in my movies. There’s something inspiring about a person who can overcome substantial adversity and continue on his chosen path against all odds. I don’t know if he has actually come back, but if he hasn’t he’s fuckin’ well on his way. May I submit to you that David Faustino is the proverbial Shit.

-Sidetracked-

The show is about some hapless schlubs doing long stretches of community service for minor crimes. The two main characters, an ex boyfriend and girlfriend, are there for 2000 hours because they accidentally started a Forrest fire while they were breaking up. David Faustino, which for those of you who don’t know played Bud on “married with children”, in a fit of ironic writing is the community service director. You might be saying in your head “Shane, why is that ironic”, but more then likely you’re not and that was actually me reading my own mind which was imagining you saying that, while you were just innocently sitting on the toilet praying for the dirty bomb in the UPS package that has flash frozen your colon will pop out and say tata! Before it ruptures your smooth rubbery walls or turns into a permanent petrified butt plug.
It’s ironic because David Faustino literally looks like he should be in trouble. The guy is like a frickin gremlin. Ironically when I was in college my fraternity brothers gave me the nickname Stripe because I was a bringer of chaos and Stripe was the name of the evil head gremlin. The one with the white Mohawk.

Too much irony?

All of the characters in this little shindig are right on. The writing is superb (I feel a little lame for using that word)…but still, it’s superb. The directing is kablonkers. All around a great show. Most great shows get cancelled due to a severe lack of viewer intelligence, but this is a Netflix original, which means that it will always be in the programming rotation. Even if they put it away, they can always drag it out to spring on future generations of unsuspecting boobtubers. At least until our amazing capacity for cognizant thought has degraded back into cave creature grunts and moans due to our lobotomizing public school slave factory we’re using to program our young…just saying.

Earlier in the history of this blog (search Netflix) I wrote a whole dissertation on what Netflix should do for content due to the content control dickishness of the major studio douche-mongers. One of the things I suggested was creating their own original content. I’m not saying Netflix executives read my blog and followed my advice to the tee, but…..you’re welcome.

I do consultant work fellas.

Did you follow my advise to create your own overdub studio to buy rights and dub foreign movies into English? You could even do it using the Google translator and autocorrect, it would be hilarious. I would laugh like Marshall frickin Bill.

I work cheap.

So in conclusion
Great show. David Faustino is a hero of the American pipples. Netflix is giving the major studios some well deserved nut flicks. And I, the great Shane Bissot, am continuing my transformation into a nostradomas, Sherlock Holmes, and Einstein burrito. Hmmmm…yummy.

Hire me you fools! Before it’s too late.

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